8 days in, my year feels wide open. I am unemployed and on the verge of a huge move out of the country – perhaps for good – and right now, it feels like my life could go in just about any direction. It’s an exhilarating feeling but one that’s laced with its share of anxiety as well.
Where will this year take me? I wonder several times each day as I count down to my departure date. I play out different scenarios in my head – jobs, travel, relationships – fantasies, really, but it’s fun to daydream about when I find a spare minute. Mostly because I’m at a point in time where I feel that literally anything could happen and I’ve never felt that more keenly than now. Before I’ve always been able to map out the next few months – if not years – of my life. First I had university, then I had a job. But now…?
Sure, the blanks leave room for the usual fears. Will I get a job? A good job? One that I will love? Will I make it all work? But right now everything feels far too shiny and new to be that scary. It’s funny how new years always have that effect on me. I did not feel at all Christmassy this year, but when my clock switched from 11.59 pm Dec 31 2010 to 12.00 am Jan 1 2011, I felt that old-new thrill once again. What a feeling! The world was brand new again, and so was I. Continue reading New Year; Start; Life.